Tag: duty

It’s interesting how life works.
When you’re born, you are completely dependant on those around you. Eating, drinking, talking, walking…. It’s impossible to accomplish those tasks without assistance and guidance. The next few years are filled with absorbing. You’re a sponge; a young impressionable being that is impressed by the world.
As you grow older you have the belief that you’ve got it, you know everything there is to possibly know, and you yearn for others to recognize your
Independence. You stumble, you trip, and you fall… But you don’t need that helping hand forever, not like you did as a child. You’re an adult now… And “you’ve got this”.
As we age, we resort back to that dependency we had as children. Self-care is no longer our forte, but a task that becomes daunting. Others are needed to step in to help us. We become reliant, often times reluctantly, on those we cared for while they were young.

I’ll be that person for you Nana… I’ve got this.

signed, nana’s bodyguard

june 16th, 2016

Nana always tells me that I’m strong. I usually tell her that I’m a superhero, which makes her laugh that adorable “Nana laugh”.
I was thinking the other day as we exchanged this routine banter that she is my superhero.
She is the strong one.
I think back to 2008 and most of 2009 (You know, the years that I took for granted, not ever imagining what my Nana would endure throughout the following years). That was a time filled with me racing her to solve the Wheel of Fortune words or phrases, calling her a cheater when I’d see her peek at all the cards while playing solitaire, and Slinkie nestling her perfect little puppy-self on her lap.

Then the last couple of months in 2009 came along…
I remember that phone call from my ma as if it were yesterday. “Nana has cancer.” I guess those are words I never could have fathomed hearing. I immediately called Emiley and we just cried. We headed up to the hospital together, both trying out hardest to keep it together in front of our mom, for our mom. We were scared and thought that we would lose her.
The next few months were touch-and-go.
December 1, 2009 – the day before my birthday…. I was at home with my mom when I heard her yell for me. Nana had been in the bathroom and my mom noticed that Nana had had a stroke. I will never forget scooping her tiny little frame up in my arms and laying her in her bed as my mom called 911. I prayed and I held her hand. I told Nana how much I love her and I watched her… I kept imagining every breathe might be her last…. Up until that day I don’t think I had ever felt such fear and sadness as I did while I ran my fingers through her hair, kissed her forehead… And kept praying .
Nana fought. She fought through surgery. She battled chemo and blazed through radiation.
Christmas came and she was at Plymouth Place (which was great Because Nicolle, Heather, and Amber all worked there at the time so they kept tabs on her). As we were opening presents at home my ma got a phone call saying that Nana had fallen out of bed. I went to see her right away and brought her Christmas present I had gotten her with me… An awesome ornament from Pier 1… With penguins on it. Nana was sleeping when I arrived, so I hung the ornament on the window next to her bed with a small suction cup I had found in our kitchen junk drawer (I swear, there’s one of everything, plus some, in there!)
Nana has been through more than I could ever imagine. She doesn’t get a break.. every day for her is filled with being woken up to family, cna’s, nurses…the puppies…. Rolling her over, adjusting her bed, adjusting her pillow, the dogs sniffing at her… And never once have I heard her complain… Except about the dogs. “Theyre a nuisance.” (That’s a whoooole other post)
Nana smiles. She smiles often. When she’s happy, I’m happy.

signed, nana’s bodyguard